What to do When You’re Getting Your Ass Kicked.

What to do when you’re getting your ass kicked.

Fights have never been fun for me, but I’ve been able to get through each fight, even if I didn’t walk out. I have some boxing teachers to thank for that.

It takes a few seconds for anyone trained in fighting to know when they’re about to get their ass kicked. Your punches become survival attempts, S.O.S. flares, praying for rescue. It’s not pretty, but you ain’t getting saved if you don’t fire some shots.

In some fights, you feel like you’re dominating from the start. That’s not a good thing because someone can fool you into thinking you’ve already won, and they’ll l you into becoming cocky. That’s where you get careless and make mistakes. Next thing, you’re looking up from the floor.

Then, there’s the sweet spot in a boxing match where you’re both trading blows. You both develop this strange telepathic connection like something out of the Twilight Zone and begin talking through punches. Your punch can say, “That hurt- you can hit hard, but I can take one and throw it back just as hard as you. The next ones will be worse.”

That was how I found calm in chaos of the scraps I’ve been in. I always have something to say. 

Why the fuck do I tell you this? Because fights are unavoidable. 

Most fights won’t be with other people; they will be with depression, shame, loss, grief, guilt, regret, overwhelm, mental illness, and the other demons that hold you down and say, “this is your life now.”

Fights with people are simple. They bruise, break and give up after enough hits on the nose. Fights in yourself may not be as simple, but both require you to punch back. 

Some Combos you can throw: 

Depression: Calling a professional counselor, committing to visiting with other people, dogs…my Gawd, spend time with a dog, & get some exercise and sunlight.

Ruminating on loss: Giving love when you miss it. Teaching others something you know, Caring for someone who doesn’t have access to care. It costs nothing to visit an older person and ask them to describe some of their happiest memories. 

Overwhelm: Clean your living/work area regularly. Book some time off, but GO SOMEWHERE and enjoy a new place. Throw your phone into the trash, then tie that bag of trash to a brick and toss it in a river, then throw the river into outer space. *Really, turn it off and leave it at home.

The fight for self-esteem, recovering from trauma, addiction, and regrets you can’t escape… all have a pretty jaw waiting for you to mess it up. 

So, I implore you to clench your fist, look at your target, and swing away.

You can’t dodge every punch that life throws at you, but you can talk mad shit and punch the crap out of them.

Life swings hard.

Swing harder.


Some Bullshit.

After twelve years of owning a business, I have a confession to make. This sign hung to the right of my front door for years.

Get Pissed.

You need to get frustrated.  You NEED to feel like you have no clue what you’re doing and not run away from those moments. Something

There are no Silver Bullets.

There are no Silver Bullets. Only Golden BBS. What I mean is that people hire trainers because they want their problems solved. They want a


Talk with a coach about your goals. Get the plan to achieve them.


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