What’s more fun? Writing your own rules.
On a zoom call with nine men last night, I was helping a participant, Mark, understand what keeps him on the “hamster wheel of stagnation.”
He would plan better health choices, but when the time came for action, he would feel stuck, selfish even, and let himself down.
“Is there anyone who depends on you?” I asked.
“I have employees, but no kids, no partner, so no.”
I replied, “Well, I’m sure you’ll go the distance to ensure your people at work are cared for.”
“Well, yeah,” Mark said.
“Why’s that?” I asked.
“I ensure they’re paid well and on time so they can provide for their families.”
“Hmm,” I said, “I hear a lot of children and spouses that depend on you.”
He gave me a headshake + lip pursing move. You know the one I’m talking about, and it’s code for “oh shit, that’s right, okay, I’m listening.”
I told him:
“I love my old dog, Charlie. And you can bet your life savings I will get him his doggie dementia and arthritis medicine every day. I will not let him suffer. I care too much about him. So I have this unwritten rule: {I show Charlie love every time I give him his meds, or every time I help him up, or every time I massage his old hips, or make his tail wag.} And I will do it until one of us is gone.
Because of this rule, it’s easy for me to love Charlie, and I can do it multiple times daily.”
Guys, It’s a zoom room full of men; there’s no better way to get their attention than bringing up a good dog.
The key is making your own rules so that you: 1) Don’t have to wait for some far-off achievement day to be successful. 2) Stop focusing on what YOU will get.
Because you will get far more by giving, trust me. My CrossFit business exponentially grew when I stopped trying to be the fittest in my gym and started helping the overweight, the disabled, the grandmothers, and just normal, everyday folks build confidence and grow, regardless of their circumstances.
Back to the Zoom Room Sausage Fest:
“Mark, let’s make a rule, so it’s EASY for you to win multiple times per day. Here’s the secret; don’t make it about you.“
We made two.
Rule one: “Every time I do something selfishly for my health & vitality, I build energy to give to others.” Therefore, it’s not selfish.
Rule two: “I win every time I eat something better for me OR take a minute just to breathe and reduce stress, OR do any amount of activity that I know will make me better over time.”
Mark had a hard time winning before. How easy do you think it is for Mark to win now?
How EASY is it to win if you write the rules in your favor? It’s easy as fuck, people! Hell yea!
Wait, I can cuss in my posts? Fuckin right, I can. I write the rules in this post.
Gawd, this post rules.
So do it! This is just a blog post for you, but for mark, it can change his entire outlook. He can change his whole life because we walked through the steps and rewired his rules for accomplishment.
1)Make winning easy and frequent.
2)It’s not about you.
Peace, Love, Write Dope Stuff.
-J
