CrossFit is the Best Ketchup

Heinz has an enormous market share in the ketchup market, especially in Pittsburgh, where my family is from. There are other kinds of ketchup out there, but when we compare them, we don’t compare them with each other. We compare them with the gold standard. We compare them with Heinz.

On Heinz’s website, one commenter posts “It’s just better ketchup.” He’s right. When you go to a restaurant and they have another kind. It feels like you are eating in a cheap cafeteria. As if you’re not worth Heinz. You’re not “Heinz-material”.


We don’t buy better ketchup for the sake of better ketchup. We buy it to have a better hot dog. If given the choice, we will skip “just another hot dog” for a Heinz Hot Dog.

If given the choice:

When selecting school districts for our children to go to, we go for the “Heinz” district so they can have a better education.

We select the “Heinz” doctor over the pop-up clinic so we have less chance of walking out with Prozac when what we needed was a referral to a talk with a therapist.

When we choose our fitness method, do we choose “just another exercise program”? Or are you worthy of something better?

CrossFit continues to be the most effective way to improve health and happiness for world’s population. It’s why millions, including our military, 1st responders, and world-class trainers choose it. We don’t choose it to say we go, we choose it to have a better life.

There are are many look-a-likes. There are other options. But Heinz is the gold standard, and there is only one Heinz.

I know what I am picking. I deserve the Heinz of fitness.

Enjoy your hotdogs.


I Am So F*cking Proud Of You.

“But, why? I’ve Failed.” you say. Yes. Exactly because you’ve failed. Look, champions don’t impress me when they win; that’s just what they do. Runners

Hippie Jeff Sh*t

The world is a giant mirror. It reflects how we feel.  If we aren’t seeing favorable things in the world reflected back to us, then


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